The Valentine's Day Weekend Memorial Beer Pong Invitational

For all those unaware of the cataclysmic events that happened at Floater's house Saturday night, the story goes like this:

Cats in attendance:
Chili
Floater
Lucy Franco
Falce
Dina
Whit
Levine
Jorge
Eva
Hartman
"The guy on the couch" that lives with Jorge and Floater

What started out as an innocent gathering turned interesting when an already drunk Chili Dog decides he wants to fight/wrestle people. Nobody really cared, except Whitney informs me that Will has been incessantly clapping throughout the night. Whit's had a few brain surgeries so I told him to cut it the fuck out but Will claps again a few moments later. I took the empty Icehouse carton and threw it at Chili's head. The thing glances off the corner of his head and actually hit more of Jorge's counter, but this was all Will needed as his fuse had been lit.

This is quickly becoming the Chili Blog.

Chili turns the corner in a shitty, tit-fucking rage as he starts shoving me. I take my time for the shock to subside and to let the laughs out, then performed a hip toss and slamed will on the couch and got on top of him. Sources close to Will's balls report that they suffered moderate damage - possibly mild damage with a heavy dose of complaining.

The next "wrestling" match pins G-Lew against Dog a-la-Chili. This picture tells the story of this one...

G-Lew fresh out of the Hobo Dojo, performing the dreaded "illegal" headlock.

Will hadn't had enough after this bout. He was quick to let us know that his neck was ailing him coming out of this headlock, then proceeded to go a couple of rounds with Franco. If my memory serves me correct, the matches were just about a draw with slight advantages to the Perfect Circle himself, because Chili Dog couldn't contain the beast.

The night's climax came right after Alex and Eva came back from getting more brrrrrrrrs. Alex was pissed cause we stopped playing beer pong for a bit to chill out. He was hootin and hollering at all of us to play a few rounds, but nobody was having it. Then, the substance kicked in. Hartman grabs a cup containing beer foam (questionable) and hurls it in the direction of Falce, Dina, Eva, and Will, respectively. The cup hits Falce's pant leg, and the contents land on the gals. Before anyone could process what had just happened, Chili dog was already on his feet trying to get to Alex as fast as he could without jumping the glass table. I had no idea what was going on until I got a lapful of Chili as he turned our corner of the table. Recovering from his initial spill, Bill approaches and shoves a baffled Alex. True to form, Hartman shies away from physical confrontation, and jumpstarts the drunken apologies to the estrogen in the room. Surprisingly, Will starts to chill out a little bit, but the damage had been done as Hartman stormed out of the casa and into the night. Eva tried in vain to do her part in keeping another drunk driver off of South Miami's streets. However I'm confident that Hartman's performance behind the wheel that night was superior to even the most sober Miami driver.

Overall, I'd view the invitational as a blast. But next time, more pictures...and more video.